It is when a man wants to play God and takes it upon himself to decide what is best for the Women in his legislation that I lose it. It is unnerving and irksome to hear the kind of moral policing that goes on in the name of society and culture. Frankly I am disgusted with these two words as they stand to be today, losing their meaning to the vested interests of a handful of greedy and power crazy beings. Society today shelters the men who decided to rob a house and relieve the home of all the jewelry and money while leaving the family of four including two little kids bound and gagged all in the name of “adventure”. Society today says “boys will be boys” and ignores those 4 excuses for “men” who brutalized a woman and chooses to victimize a woman who is dead now, and questions as to why was she out with a friend after 9 in the night. The culture today blames fast food and Chinese food for the rise in crime against women while protecting the inhuman depraves who commit the act. The society and the culture comes together to find a solution as ridiculous as lowering the marriageable age of women to prevent rapes. The society and the moral police ignore marital rape as crime. They all ignore women as beings with any intellect or say and treat them as mere mediums to sate their basal urge of sex, production of an heir and completion of their daily chores of cooking and cleaning.
I am no feminist with a long list of why can’t woman do this and that… All I ask for, no demand for is a sane and fair outlook. To be treated as equal, if not special. I do not want reservation or special seats in the metro, but all I need is a surety that I can board a public conveyance mode with my head held high and without the fear of being groped, raped or molested… Or does the society, culture and certain political honchos think I am being ludicrous and hysterical, and that I need to calm down!
The expectations from a girl born in a middle class or upper middle class, average Indian family is very defined and uncomplicated. Highly goal oriented, the expectations in simple words are to abide by the regulations put forth by the society, to prepare for a life in the home of in-laws and then to abide by the regulations put forth by this new household. In return the girls have the advantage of being protected by the family, society and the vices of the it or the Big Bad World.
Or is it?
Is it really that simple to live by the regulations put forth by the society that is ready to crucify you and set scavengers off on you at least or no provocation? Is it that simple to abide by the simple rules in your new home when you see a predator within the ones that are supposed to take care of you protect you and veil you from the discomforts of the outside world? What if this Big Bad World seeps through the protective shell to slowly take over this veil of protection and starts inducing a painful nightmare, bringing pain that is sure to slowly build up your destruction?
Let me state it very clearly here… I am no feminist… I do not even aspire to be… nor am i a pacifist or a reformist of any sort… for a simple reason that labels destroy ideals… I only have a few musings based simply on what I see around me. Today, I see The Woman in the society being broken down bit by bit, without the realization that the entire society and its standards are being lowered too… because quite simply, aren’t women an important part of it all too!
I recently watched a Bengali movie – Proloy and I wondered what it is that motivates people like Barun Biswas to be the vigilante that he came to be. For one person from among us to touch so many lives on so many levels. At the same time it is immensely saddening that it was those very people those very lives that he touched who forgot them with great ease.
My interpretation of the entire situation was that, today we have come put our faith in the person and ignore the very ideologies that they talk about, the incidents, the turn of events that bring about the intense act of rebellion, the revolution is somewhere lost in our tradition of worshiping the hero, not the cause. So, when we lose the man, we lose our faith and in turn our hope. I just can’t remember the last time I saw anyone talk with great passion about any ideology, it is always a hero that we look for not the values, not the ethics and definitely not the cause. It happened in the case of Maoists, the Naxalites, the Communists and now I see the beginning of a similar situation in the case of the much famed and infamous Aam Admi Party.
It is always the man we have talked about, the man we have built up to be a messiah and in that passion towards that one man, the cause is somehow lost and then left behind.
Also, I saw the second half of the movie, it was interesting to watch as a fiction, it was greatly satisfying to see one man avenge the death of a revolutionary, but what did it do for the cause? The story drifted from the cause that the man stood for to a completely different angle, avenging his death. And sadly as this one man’s murder was avenged, the cause was murdered and quietly buried as the same situations continue to prevail, even today…